Right after hanging up that call, and I cried for lesser than 5 mins. And then I sit back and thought to myself, is this still not enough? 3 years of on and offs, were these still not enough? Knowing where this will end, what are we insisting on?
So, I've decided. Enough is enough. I might be just saying, but lemme prove to myself and to those who care. Though this is never easy, but I got through this before. It wasn't that hard after all. :)
Do you realized how many chances you gave up?
Do you realized how long this has been dragging on?
Do you realized whether your sacrifice is appreciated and paid off?
Yes, often I've got that a lot from my dearest ones. I always wanted to move on, I never asked for this back after that once and only time. But somehow I've allowed his begging and requests of getting back together to fool with me, partially because of the feeling is still there.
And so, I blamed myself for that. No one else but myself. If only I could be cruel enough, to be persistent enough, it should be settled long time ago. And by right, I should be able to let someone who truly loves me sharing every bits of my life with me by now already. In this case, I don't have to be jelly of other couples being so lovey dovey by seeing their pictures anymore.
Well, by which, that day will be coming soon I believe! But right now, I've my goals for my future and all. Time to fulfill them one by one.
Several trips I've planned starting June so YAYYYYYY! Brand new beginning brand new life brand new me; A HAPPY ME! :)
Me promise, no more whines, no more sad faces from now on.
Yours truly,
Caryne!
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